Seven Quick Takes
1. Well, it’s Labor Day weekend, which means summer is more or less over, and I am still wondering what the hell happened. I did not accomplish my (one, very simple) goal for this summer, which was to do some simple sewing projects. However, I did do a lot of other things this summer, including create a human being inside my uterus (with my husband’s help, of course, must give credit where credit is due). Since this human being will make his-or-her ex utero appearance sometime in late February or early March of next year, the odds are VERY likely that next summer will also be a blur. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
2. Speaking of not having it any other way, Sarah Bessey’s recent post In Which He Wouldn’t Do Anything Different pretty much ruined me:
…that night, I said, “Don’t you miss it? What do you think? Should we make it more of a priority to pursue some official kind of ministry life again?” And so, for the millionth time, we talked it through, and we yelled at each other, then: ssshhhhhh! the tinies are sleeping! and eventually, he was laying stretched out on the couch, his arm flung over his eyes, we needed to go to bed by now.
“I miss it, sure, Sarah, and I yearn for it, and I hope I do it for the rest of my life, someday, but today [Sunday] was today, and it was wonderful. I built a work bench with my son, and I wouldn’t do it anything different,” he said. “If all I ever do right in my life is love those kids down the hall, I’m satisfied, can’t you see?”
3. Also active in the ruining of me (via words that make me want to shout, “Yes, YES! That’s it!” and then whisper, “Oh shit.”) was this quote from Joan Chittister, which found its way into my Facebook feed:
I do not believe that just because you’re opposed to abortion that that makes you pro-life. In fact, I think in many cases, your morality is deeply lacking. If all you want is a child born but not a child fed, not a child educated, not a child housed and why would I think that you don’t? Because you don’t want any tax money to go there. That’s not pro-life. That’s pro-birth. We need a much broader conversation on what the morality of pro-life is.
In other words, “Emily, what are you doing with your life to be a part of the solution?” My answer: “Right now, not nearly enough.”
4. This little snippet from What Boys Need from Moms encouraged me a lot to me this week:
It’s important for mothers of boys to offer their sons more independence based on his growing needs. At 18 months when a son starts to move away from his mom to identify more with his father or other men, he needs a mom who is patient and understanding. …who refrains from making him feel guilty or seeing his desire to move away as rejecting.
Boys need moms who hug, cuddle, hold, and touch them. Research studies have shown that when a baby boy reaches 6 months of age mothers’ raising boys talk and touch them less than they talk and touch baby girls. Oxytocin is a bonding hormone that Dr. Allan Schore of USCA School of Medicine has found to increase between mother and child nurturing interactions. As oxytocin levels increase, cortisol (stress hormone) levels decrease. Boys need moms who will hug, rock, and comfort them in order to create healthy bonds and lower stress hormones.
This is what I try to do with Garrett, and I pray God helps me do so consistently – let him pull away when he wants to, when he needs to, but always be available to love and encourage him, to hold him close and reassure him, when he needs me. This is so hard to do when I am busy or frazzled or not feeling 100% myself, but I it is a top priority for me.
5. I really loved this birthday post chock full of awesome goals for the author’s 33rd year, and I thought, “Hey, I’m going to do that on my next birthday! But then I remembered that I excel at making lists of goals and suck at actually meeting those goals. I refer you again to my (one, very simple) goal for this summer, which did not happen. In case you can’t tell, I’m feeling a little bit down on myself (and my non-ability to follow through on good intentions) today.
6. I’ve been super busy on Pinterest lately, in an effort to keep from actually doing anything creative or productive in real life. (I kid, I kid!) (Okay, no I don’t.) One thing I found that I ABSOLUTELY MUST HAVE:
The readymade hat only costs $31, but I can’t help but think it would be so much fun to crochet this thing myself, if I could find a pattern for it. And if I could actually discipline myself to start crocheting again (I think the last project I actually finished was a Christmas present for my nieces back in 2009 when I was gestating my first little turkey).
7. Also super awesome on Pinterest (and also the brainchild of the super awesome Sarah Bessey): This board that celebrates wild and wonderful women of all shapes, sizes, and callings. Here’s a couple of my faves:
“We need to understand that there is no formula for how women should lead their lives….Every woman deserves the chance to realize her God-given potential.” — Hillary Clinton
(BTW, you don’t have to like Hilary to know that she’s speaking the truth here.)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.” — Ina May Gaskin
(P.S. I am reading Ina May’s Birth Matters: A Midwife’s Manifesta and it is just rocking my world.)
That’s it for me, today, folks. Go see Jen for more quick takes.